ESPN has been unveiling team-by-team previews in advance of the NBA Trade Deadline (Feb. 18) and your Miami Heat was finally featured this morning.

I’ve inputted their six hypothetical deals into the NBA Trade Machine to visually illustrate how they’d work financially and provided a brief analysis of each one, along with an emoji reaction because 2016.

Carmelo Anthony

Miami Heat Trade Carmelo ANthony

Reaction:💩

If this trade was a living being, it’d take it out back and put a double-barreled shotgun to its heart. Then I’d run it over with a tractor before putting its remains in a blender.

ESPN cooked up a previous Carmelo-to-Miami deal, but this one is even more ridiculous, this time including both Hassan Whiteside and Josh McRoberts in addition to Justise Winslow and Luol Deng.

So Miami is going to trade their best young asset in Justise Winslow, who at worst is an elite defensive stopper on the wing with the ability to make winning plays on both ends, for an average-shooting, ball-stopping 31-year-old with knee issues who will be making over TEN TIMES (over $100 million) as much over the next four years? Because that swap in itself is not nutty enough, let’s throw in the league’s most enigmatic player and top shot-blocker in Whiteside and a frail-but-effective McBob.

If the salaries were even, I wouldn’t trade Winslow — his shooting is improving, by the way — for Anthony straight up. Heat Twitter, kindly go yell at the author for this blasphemy (@bbdoolittle).

Pau Gasol

Screen Shot 2016-02-07 at 9.46.38 AM copy

Reaction: 👍

Apparently this one was concocted by our buddy Kevin Pelton, who comically named Goran Dragic as a potential trade target for the Houston Rockets last week.

I like this deal.

It’s a win-now move that would tempt Pat Riley and reinvigorate Miami’s offense. Gasol is a fine passer, light-years ahead of Whiteside from a Basketball IQ standpoint, and can shoot, even knocking down 25-of-58 (43%)  from three the past two seasons. There’s no question he would be more dependable than Whiteside in the playoffs. And if Gasol were to opt-in for next year, it’s at a cap-friendly $7.8 million.

The only issue is it would deplete Miami’s front-court depth. I’d try to keep McRoberts if possible. His contract will look nice in the coming years as the cap engorges.

Also, would Riles really trade Haslem? My gut is they’d come to an understanding, especially with Haslem riding pine and on an expiring deal. He’ll still have a spot with this organization for as long as he wants one.

Ryan Anderson

whiteside and deng for anderson

Reaction: 🤔

Doolittle borrowed this one from Tom Haberstroh and it’s certainly worth considering. I’m fascinated to see what a Ryan Anderson-Chris Bosh front line would look like.

Miami’s defense and depth would suffer, especially on the wing where the team is already without Tyler Johnson for a while. But I’d probably pull the trigger on this one because it would maximize Goran Dragic and Dwyane Wade, and could jolt this team into an intriguing contender.

Danilo Gallinari

Danilo

Reaction: 😬

Repeat after me: I will not consider trading Justise Winslow unless it’s in a package for a young superstar (think DeMarcus Cousins-ish).

Lakers and Celtics

Doolittle then proposes two other deals:

(1) Whiteside, Deng, and filler to the Lakers for Roy Hibbert and Lou Williams — NOPE. Can you imagine Heat Twitter’s reaction if they traded for Hibbert? If I had the ability to go back in time afterward I’d like to see this move happen.

(2) Whiteside, Deng and more filler to the Celtics for Jae Crowder, Avery Bradley and Tyler Zeller. You’d think about it for a second but does it make them any better in the short or long-term?

To recap, hell no to Melo, yes to Gasol or Anderson, and straight laughs at the last two.

Follow Josh on Twitter @JoshBaumgard