I enjoy Greg Cote’s work on the Dan Le Batard Show.
Whether it’s perpetually missing hard network outs despite it being the SAME TIME every single week…
— Dan Le Batard Show (@LeBatardShow) May 3, 2016
or spewing his grandfathery “Back in My Day” takes, bitching about the complexity of macchiatos.
However, this steaming column he wrote after the Miami Heat’s series saving Game 4 overtime victory to knot it at two games apiece should be shredded, burned, and then sprinkled into Dwyane Wade’s toilet.
The premise: Heat fans should be careful in rooting for their team to advance to the conference finals against a lurking LeBron James and the Cavaliers because they have no prayer and will be “humiliated.”
Now, Heat fans must grapple with the conundrum of whether to even want their team to advance past Toronto and get to LeBron. Because tears are surely waiting, no? Humiliation, even.
Perhaps the indignity of being swept in four straight games while LeBron exalts and preens and Pat Riley is left to watch it all grimly, nearly as embarrassed and angry as he was that day on the West Coast when a distracted LeBron granted a token last-minute meeting to Riley and talked to his buddies during it, knowing all the while he was jilting the Heat and heading back to Ohio.
Greg Cote does not got the guts.
If the roles were reversed and Miami was the juggernaut coming off two sweeps, this undoubtedly would be an acceptable, even acclaimed, column in Cleveland.
But this is the Miami Heat, a team that’s been to five NBA Finals in the last ten years. A franchise led by a man with the biggest balls in South Beach in Pat Riley, in a city that features more beautiful women than Cleveland has women.
LeBron, resting after a Cavs sweep of Atlanta, is biding time, licking lips, waiting for the Miami-Toronto survivor and no doubt hoping it’s the Heat.
The best hope of either the Heat or Raptors is that LeBron might injure himself, perhaps break a rib, belly-laughing so hard at the idea either could beat him and his Cavs right now.
Cote’s take is even smellier than his trade-Dan-Marino-in-his-prime column from ’93.
It’s like he doesn’t comprehend the concept of sports fandom. Nevermind the fact Miami, down two all-star centers, is playing with house money and ALL the pressure would be on Cleveland.
I don’t care if precogs in Minority Report flat out told us Miami will get swept and lose by an average of 45 points — I want Miami-Cleveland because this franchise backs down from nothing no matter how great the odds. Because being a petrified sports fan is not being one at all.
While Cote watches the next few games in the fetal position praying for two quick losses to avoid any potential trauma, real Heat fans will be cracking their knuckles while thirsting for the opportunity to compete against what everyone believes is the best team in the conference.
Heat fans, the choice is yours: run away like Cote or stay if you got the guts.